It’s been a few weeks since my last blog, but my laptop crashed. Another lesson learned. So, to help you as I help me, make sure you always backup your work, because you never know when your laptop will die. RIP friend. Now my next task is to buy a jump drive. I thought about using my phone but Swype has its own language sometimes, so I declined that reasoning. Now I’m back, so let’s get to the real reason why we are here.
Have you ever been at a crossroads? Not understanding why you are there? Not understanding why there are so many roads to take, as you try to come up with one answer, one path. Well that’s what I’ve been dealing with the past few months, so I’m excited to finally write it out and release it.
It all started December 10, 2017, the day I got married. I didn’t know how hard the transition from my home church to my new church would be, but it slowly came to the forefront. I had been at South Central church of Christ, formerly Rochester Heights, for 31 years. It was my home away from home. I had made lifelong friends, second and third moms, had spiritual guidance, and on top of that, my dad is the preacher. The day I got married, I told the church it would be my last Sunday as an active member. Once I said my peace I started to cry, then my dad starting singing, “God bless Kendra my Lord,” and all Heaven broke loose. One by one, the congregation started standing and crying, which made matters worse. It was so much love, compassion, humility, and God in that moment. I was so happy to have felt real love and understood what it looked like through my South Central family. Would my new church be this way? Only time would tell.
As I began to probe my husband about our church and the active ministries, I got a sense of there’s nothing for me to do here. In my singlehood, I worked on various ministries. I was on the praise team, worked on the Homecoming committee in producing the booklet, worked on our Woman’s Day program, just helped launch the Millennials ministry, briefly worked on the Intouch ministry, etc. In my mind I said, “So I have to find another church to go to cause this ain’t gon cut it.” That was my true and honest reaction. Then I started to rattle off all the surrounding churches that we could visit, but I didn’t want to seem hasty either, so I settled into Sunday morning worship and Wednesday night bible study. For anyone that knows me knows that doesn’t work for me. I can’t praise God on Sunday and do nothing for the church every other day. As I was having those thoughts, word about us starting a Millennials group came about. It was possible that I could have a leadership role, which was great since I was ready to work. Over the past couple of months, we’ve been able to get the group started, but not in the capacity that works for me. You can see how I put “me” in there. So, instead of looking at its possibilities, I started to compare my new church to South Central. While I believe there are healthy ways to compare, I wasn’t doing it in a way that left me optimistic, but bitter and hardened. I would say, “This ain’t the way you do things. I was taught a different way, so this can’t be right.” So, I found myself at a crossroads. How do I do a "work" here? Why should I stay? Why should we stay? Then the Lord blessed me at South Central’s Woman’s Day.
South Central’s Woman’s Day is like a homecoming. Great speakers, skits, dialogue, and awesome fellowship. It was the type of work and fellowship that I had been missing. That evening, my mom, Mrs. Priscilla Marshall and I went out for dinner. I told them my concerns and how I was feeling. They told me I needed to start proactively seeking relationships, and see what I could do based off the resources given to me now. I didn’t have to look for the same ministries, I could see where I could be of service with my talents and abilities. That was the conversation I needed. I had to stop thinking about all the different things I did at South Central and look at my new church for its potential. So that Monday I started working on some projects and I felt purposeful again. I felt like even if this church doesn’t become my home years down the line, I’m going to make the best of this experience. I’m going to do whatever I can to uplift this church not tear it down. I must also note, that I was told by someone that I had a work to do at that church, not even knowing the circumstances around it. Then a week after Woman’s Day after church, a few people told me they were happy that I attended their church, and the same thing happened the following Sunday and the following Sunday. Through it all God had been telling me to be still, but I didn’t want to be. I was ready to run, although I knew there was purpose in staying.
So, I’ve said all that to say, be still. God puts you exactly where He wants you to be. God doesn’t mind you probing Him with questions and concerns, but He does mind when you give it to Him, then try to take it back. Give it to God! Then listen as to what path to take. It’s only a crossroads when you look at your problem physically. When you view it spiritually it’s only one way to walk. So, walk in God’s light. Be cheerful in everything you do and don’t make every difference a dead end. Sometimes the way we look at the problem, is the problem (Bro. Dublin). Seek understanding not agreement, because that’s how you grow.
Be blessed and always stay sunny on the inside!